Content Overview 
- Summary
- Step 1. Think through what you do, and do not, want if there are medical decisions to be made and you cannot communicate your wishes.
- Step 2. Discuss with the person whether he or she is willing to act as your Proxy.
- Step 3.Take the time to provide as clear an idea as possible of just what your wishes and your beliefs are.
- Step 4. Even if you think you already know, ask the person you're proposing to appoint as your proxy what he or she thinks about the different topics under discussion.
- Step 5. Ask the Proxy questions about things that could happen to confirm you both have the same understanding about what you do and do not want.
- Step 6. Include the person's name in your Healthcare Proxy document, and ask him or her to affirm their agreement in writing.
What To Discuss With A Healthcare Proxy
Step 2. Discuss with the person whether he or she is willing to act as your Proxy.
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Acting as your Proxy is not something to surprise someone with - not even an alternate proxy and not even if the person is your spouse. Some people, no matter how close they are to you, may have problems with the role and may not wish to undertake it.
As part of the request, consider mentioning what you would like the person to do for you. You don't have to be specific at this point. A general statement will do. For example: "I'd like you to think about being my Health Care Proxy. I trust you and I know you'll do what I need. We can discuss the specifics after you've thought about it. In general, I'd like you to know that if I become a vegetable, with no hope of recovery, I'd like you to pull the plug."
This will give the person time to think about your request and what it can mean. Of course, if he or she understands the request and is agreeable, time to think about saying "yes" may not be needed.
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